The Things That Matter

by Myla Jensen

Consider this, one day your life will be over. You will not know the day or hour. Death does not care if you are ready or not. Death will take you when it determines it is time. All of the things you take for granted will be gone forever and never seen again.

Sunsets, the sounds of laughter, beautiful songs, and your family, do these things matter? Realize once you are gone there will be no more sunsets, no more laughter, no more moments with your family. All of the treasures you own will no longer be yours. Others will fight for those things you held most dear.

Frustrations, arguments, fights and anger will also disappear. Along with this so will your hopes, dreams, and goals. Everything that seemed significant and important will fade away.

Your position in life does not matter. Death does not care if you are rich or poor, man nor woman, death never takes this into consideration. No matter how invincible you think you are, death will always prevail.

So what is most important to you? How will you be remembered? What matters? ...continue reading here.

The Last Lecture

by Randy Pausch

It’s wonderful to be here. What Indira didn’t tell you is that this lecture series used to be called the Last Lecture. If you had one last lecture to give before you died, what would it be? I thought, damn, I finally nailed the venue and they renamed it.

So, you know, in case there’s anybody who wandered in and doesn’t know the back story, my dad always taught me that when there’s an elephant in the room, introduce them.

If you look at my CAT scans, there are approximately 10 tumors in my liver, and the doctors told me 3-6 months of good health left. That was a month ago, so you can do the math. I have some of the best doctors in the world.

So that is what it is. We can’t change it, and we just have to decide how we’re going to respond to that. We cannot change the cards we are dealt, just how we play the hand. If I don’t seem as depressed or morose as I should be, sorry to disappoint you. [laughter] And I assure you I am not in denial...continue reading here

Depression's Forgotten Victims

By Myla Jensen

Families are often the forgotten victims of mental illness. Unfortunately, family members can be placed in difficult situations and forced to make difficult decisions that impact not just the individual but the entire family. No family should be made to feel ashamed, but too often this is the case.

Since there is such a stigma with mental illness, how can a family cope? The most important step in dealing with the situation is to remember depression IS an illness. The individual that has this illness cannot control how they act or seeing the world. No one more than them would love to be normal. Do not hold anger and animosity against that person. This is a physical condition that the person cannot control. Unfortunately often the illness is in control.

Remember to take a step back from the situation. Do not let the illness bring you into that world. Depression has a way of infecting those around it. Often people with depression are screaming on the inside for someone just to care. A simple I love you and letting them know they are important can make a difference for everyone involved, even if it is a small one. Families need to keep in mind that no one is to blame for the illness. Depression is caused by numerous medical factors that can be treated. It is no one's fault.

To better understand depression, families can learn about its effects. Look at the illness as if it were cancer or some other disease. Research will empower families with the knowledge to know what is happening and how to deal with different situations. Understanding depression and how it affects the individual and families will help families deal with their own emotions. Depression can be managed effectively over time, time being the key word.

Families need to know they are not alone. Many people suffer from depression and the families suffer with them. Remember depression is a common condition and there are many families out there caring for someone who has depression. Find a support group or another individual who has helped take care of a family member with the disease.

Families can experience a wide range of emotions. This is perfectly normal and to be expected. It is very difficult to take care of someone whose behavior is always bringing you into the illness. Do not let these feelings cause conflict with the person or other family members. Understand these feelings are normal and find way to set them behind you. Easier said than done? Yes, but it can be done.

Lastly remember to have hope. Depression is treatable and can be managed. Some days will be better than others, remember everyone goes through good and bad days. Individuals with depression just have a harder time identifying the good days. Be there for one another. There will be times families will feel overwhelmed. Just keep in mind, a difference can be made by a family's actions, to both those with the illness and those suffering from its effects.

Courage

Whatever you do, you need courage. Whatever course you decide upon, there is always someone to tell you you are wrong. There are always difficulties arising which tempt you to believe that your critics are right. To map out a course of action and follow it to the end, requires some of the same courage which a soldier needs.

Ralph Waldo Emerson

Life's challenges are not supposed to paralyze you, they're supposed to help you discover who you are.
- Bernice Johnson Reagon

Failure occurs only when one stops trying. Babe Ruth once said it is hard to defeat a man who won't give up. You are never a failure until you stop trying. Everyone encounters road blocks and faces difficult choices. Everyone! This is called life. We are hear to learn. Some lessons are harder than others, but yet once learned make us that much stronger and wiser. As long as you have learned from the obstacle in your path, you will not encounter it again.

There are many well known individuals that had a very tough go of life, but they did not give up. Samuel Beckett once said ""Ever tried. Ever failed. No matter. Try Again. Fail again. Fail better." Just because you fail at something doesn't mean you should not still go after your goal. Failure is the way life lets you know that you need to go about it in a different direction. Randy Pesch said life puts up brick walls to prevent others from obtaining our dreams. How very right he is.

Look ahead, do not look back on what could have been. There are no "what could have been's", only decisions made, whether right or wrong. Accept that you made the best decision you could at the time. Be kind to your self and trust yourself, for then you will be given the strength to overcome the obstacles that may lie in your way.

 

Finish every day and be done with it. You have done what you could. Some blunders and absurdities no doubt have crept in; forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day; begin it well and serenely and with too high a spirit to be cumbered with your old nonsense. This day is all that is good and fair. It is too dear, with its hopes and invitations, to waste a moment on yesterdays.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson

Obstacles are like wild animals. They are cowards but they will bluff you if they can. If they see you are afraid of them... they are liable to spring upon you; but if you look them squarely in the eye, they will slink out of sight. - Orison Swett Marden

Stand up to your obstacles and do something about them. You will find that they haven't half the strength you think they have. - Norman Vincent Peale